Monday, August 15, 2011
Do you like having conversations with your friends while you're eating? Probably.
Do you like wearing shorts when it's 125-degrees outside? It's a damn near necessity.
So what's my point? That you should pass right on by The Park if you like doing the above things. They apparently don't allow baggy clothes, especially shorts, or wife-beater tees. It's fine to have a dress code, but when you fail to include this dress code on your website -- where people go to get information about your establishment -- you're going to piss off some people. Yeah, maybe you don't give a shit that you pissed *these* people off. After all, they were dressed for the Austin heat, and we just can't support that insane idea at Park at the Domain. But word of mouth is a powerful thing. That's all I'm saying.
As far as having conversations while you're eating, you best remember to have your loudest friends in tow. Because that one timid, bashful friend with the voice as delicate as a tulip? You won't hear a thing she has to say, if she bothers to say anything at all, and this is even if your group sits outside. I couldn't hear the three women sitting two people away from me, so I had to smile, nod, laugh, and pretend I heard whatever joke was just told, all the while wishing we would just pay our checks and leave so we could go outside the restaurant where I could actually look into my friends' eyes instead of reading their lips. Even once we got outside, we still had to speak loudly. Also, Park, your DJ sucks ass. I don't need no Lady Gaga at 200 decibels while I'm fighting a hangover.
Service wasn't bad. Our waitress, for the most part, was on top of her game. I noticed all the waitresses are young and modelesque. I suspect it must be an employment requirement, like it used to be for stewardesses. I have no desire to ever wait tables again, but I assume I'm not quite pretty enough to work here. Wouldn't want to, anyway. The horrible acoustics would render me deaf and insanely angry.
As far as the food, it was decent. The brunch is $15, all you can eat. They really didn't have that much food to offer, quite frankly. My first plate consisted of some sort of cheesy rice casserole with carrots and broccoli, which I enjoyed. Rice is really carby, though, and thus wreaks havoc with my blood sugar, so I only had one helping of this. If my immune system wasn't such a bitch as to have given me type 1 diabetes, I would have helped myself to a plateful of this casserole alone.
Also somewhat enjoyed a scoop of green bean casserole, which involved cheese and french-fried onion strings. My only problem with this dish was that another type of strings were still attached to the green beans. These strings were attached to the beans when they grew and were picked, and they should be removed prior to cooking. Why? Because they're extremely difficult to chew. If not for these pesky things, I would have enjoyed the dish a lot more. For what it's worth, I have named this dish "green string casserole".
I put a delicious-looking rib on my second plate, along with a several scoops of green string casserole and caesar salad, but I was too full to eat much of anything on that plate. The rib sat there taunting me. I toyed with the idea of stuffing it in my face, but I declined.
Best chocolate chip cookie ever. Park provides a whole table full of various desserts, all of which looked delicious. I tried some sort of mousse petit four thingie, which made me thankful I'm not allergic to chocolate. The chocolate chip cookie, though, had me devising ways of sneaking several more of them onto my person so I could take them home and sneak them INTO my person. I nearly put a churro on my plate, but when I attempted to pick one up with the tongs, it seemed awfully hard. No thanks.
Despite delicious desserts and somewhat-scrumptious casseroles, I can think of several other places I'd rather spend $15. Eating a couple of sammiches at a quiet Jersey Mike's would be an excellent example.