I met a group here one night at 7pm, but I decided to walk to Bess immediately after work so I could get my eating and check-paying out of the way so I could quickly escape and make my bus at 7:40.
Based on other reviews, I expected the food to be hit-or-miss and expensive, and the service to be subpar. I was actually excited about the Happy Hour menu. They offer a few things for $2, some for $3, others for $5, and so on. I'm sure there's a term for that kind of Happy Hour menu, but I can't think of it.
I walked in and the hostess was extremely nice. I told her I was meeting a party at 7pm but that I wanted to hang at the bar in the meantime. The bartender, Beth, was very nice, as well. The drinks on their cocktail menu were expensive, but I decided to go ahead and order a chocolate martini. I tasted way too much liquor in it. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad she gave me a strong pour, but it would have been nice to be able to taste the chocolate. I ordered the Mini Croque Monsieur on sourdough bread, minus mustard, with fried egg, and sat back to take in the surroundings.
That's when I noticed a French cover of "And I Love Her" (Beatles). It's not one of my favorite Beatles songs to begin with, but this French group really brought it down several levels. This song was followed by some kind of island-sounding hip-hop. I felt like I should be sunbathing in the Caribbean. It wasn't terrible, but it certainly wasn't what I expected or necessarily wanted in the middle of February.
The Mini Croque was very good, especially the bechamel and cheese. It was small, but at least it was only $5. And it pretty much filled me up. The Croque was a bit too peppery for my taste, though.
Much like everyone else, I liked the warmth and decoration of the space. Seemed like it could be a romantic place, what with the mood lighting and all. Said mood lighting interfered with my taking a picture of the Croque Monsieur.
The music suddenly morphed into heavily synthesized Euro pop, which completely turned me off. Any minute I expected fashion models to exit the draped kitchen door and shake their little tushes on the catwalk. Yeah, on the catwalk. On the catwalk, yeah... I shake my little tush on the catwalk.
Where am I again? Oh yeah, the Jean Paul Gaultier Fashion Show in Paris. So then this pale anorexic teen struts onto the runway and trips on her dress! Huh? Oh yeah... Bess Bistro. Right. Well, a waitress tripped and dropped a tray, but she wasn't hurt and she laughed it off.
I got pretty bored sitting there waiting for 7pm to happen. I know it's not Bess Bistro's business to keep me entertained, but it would have been nice if they'd aired some news on the TV instead of Olympic curling. I tried to keep myself busy typing notes on my phone, but I could still hear the clock ticking. Or was that the beat of the annoying pop music? I'd already raped a Croque Monsieur (because it's pretty difficult to rape a man in any other situation), and I toyed with the idea of getting some other morsel. So I asked Beth to bring out the dessert tray for my ogling pleasure.
The only thing on that tray that looked any good was the chocolate mousse. It came with a chocolate almond biscotti. I'm not a huge fan of biscotti, but this particular piece at least wasn't hard enough to break my teeth. It tasted okay. The mousse itself was pretty good, but not satisfying. It didn't taste like the real thing. It tasted like... like... diet chocolate mousse. At that point, I felt like I'd just had sex with a partner who got done in two minutes and rolled over to go to sleep, leaving me completely frustrated. I expected more.
That somehow led me to think about that cute guy who recently started riding my bus in the afternoon. The cute guy I couldn't see yesterday because I chose to go to Bess instead of going home right after work on the magic bus. Magic bus. Now I've got that Who song stuck in my head, which is much better than what Bess was playing. I ordered a Miller Lt (shut up; I wanted something cheap) and started fantasizing about what might happen on the bus next time.
Seven o'clock was finally approaching, so I ordered another Miller Lt so I'd have something to drink while I was talking to the Meetup group for the next thirty minutes. I also paid my tab. I hadn't realized I'd gotten almost $30 worth of stuff. Oh well. I met up with the group and chit-chatted for a half hour, and then I jetted to the bus stop. Oh, and for our group, they had given us a "Recession-Proof Wine List" with nothing but $20-30 bottles listed on it (no glass prices). I can get cheaper tasty wine at Spec's.
So I enjoyed the Croque Monsieur, but nothing else on Bess' eclectic menu piqued my interest. And that chocolate mousse was a let-down. Although I would recommend Bess for Happy Hour in order to try the food, I didn't see any drink specials. I doubt I'll go back.
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